Tag Archives: personal

IMPROVISED LETTER TO MY BELOVED READERS

Dear Facebook and Twitter stalkers who reads this (as well as those few other people who have stumbled upon this post by accident),

It was my 18th birthday on August 1st.

Out of over 20 people to who I talk to daily,only 3 – 4 of them actually remembered of it and sent me some really nice words on my special day. So,thank you from the bottom of my heart,guys! I won’t forget it,believe me 🙂

And you know what’s funny: Today,when I’m writing this,is August 7th and people still keep congrating me now. It’s like a chain reaction or something! Like… B*tch,it was a week ago,don’t think that congrating me now will make me feel any better,alright? If you didn’t remember it on 1st then you just didn’t,at least don’t greet me right now because it’s really embarassing for me and I am sure,for you as well,I’m just saying.

So,with all of this I’m just trying to say – Thank you to those VERY few people who did congrat me on my birthday – that was very thoughtful of you! And to those who didn’t – I hate you. No seriously,I really do.

 

Sincerely,

I’m 18 now,YOU MAD?

 

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I do like watermelons… But not this one.

So,I was eating watermelon the other day and it’s always a mess when it comes to:

1) cutting it,so you wouldn’t cut a piece of your hand with it;

2) eating it,so it wouldn’t drop all over your shirt,your mouth,your hands… Like,everywhere basically!

And then I saw this video on Tumblr (because I tracked the “watermelon” tag the other day. So what,some people track even weirder things there,so this is nowhere creepy yet) and it’s like… I do like watermelons but I would never in my life eat one,which would be served like this.

Enjoy the video,guys!

And I know it’s gross and all,so…. You’re welcome.

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A little about my birthday

In other news,it’s my birthday soon! Which is both amazing and tragic,concidering how it always goes. And it doesn’t go well,I can tell you that.

I am pretty positive that nobody will remember and even the ones who will…. Like,what’s the easiest way to wish somebody a ‘happy birthday’? Via Facebook,ofcourse! So I will most likely get no texts and no calls,just a f*#king wall post saying “Happy Birthday”. How classy is that.

Another thing is,I don’t really celebrate that stuff. Like,birthdays are pretty much dead to me. I am not emo or emotionally destructive,I just don’t really see the point of celebrating,I guess. Alright,that probably is emotionally destructive but HEY! You’re not the boss of me,I do whatever I want. Yee-ah! Did that just sound bad-ass or am I really that socially awkward?

Socially awkward,oh wow,that didn’t really make sense,did it.

Anyways.

And DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED on having a giant birthday cake. I don’t even eat cake! My parents,however,always insist I have one,so I usually end up stuffing my mouth full of it,just enough to make them smile. And yes,I know I’m a good kid,thank you.

So,with all this,I’m just going to say – F  U,18! And F-U very,very much.

Alexa has spoken.

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Sometimes being a teenager makes you wanna die.

“sometimes being a teenager makes you want to die.”

I heard this phrase on AWKWARD and actually thought it was kind of powerful.

‘Cause really,sometimes as a teen you do want to die – without even concidering the awful and sad effect that it’d leave on your beloved ones,friends and all other people who care about you – because sometimes,just sometimes it gets too much. It just does.

I’ve been there,I’ve felt that.

And you know what,I try and try to go on and pretend like I never think of those things – knowing that I would never be powerful enough to cut my own life like that – but in fact,I do. Everyone does,from some point!

I am sick and tired of feeling the way I do and I feel like that pretty much every week, at least once. You see,the funny thing is,it does get better. You know how they say “time heals” but what they don’t tell is that when it does get better,there will eventually come that moment when it’ll get worse again. And then better. And then back to bad. And then better. And then,eventually,it’ll all be bad all over again… That’s something I can say from my own experiences,unfortunately.

I’m a fighter by nature,grown in a family of strong woman,but I also have a fragile side,which I don’t show too often but sometimes I guess I should – just enough to let people know it’s not always as perfect and nice as it seems to be from other people’s perspective.

Here,I’ve said it.

In any way,what I’m trying to tell here in a very weird and twisted way isdon’t do anything to yourself without thinking about it clearly. Because really,is there a way back after? There isn’t,as sad as it is. And it will get better – and I’m not saying it won’t get worse again within a few weeks,months,years,but all we  can do is just hope that by the time the bad stuff will come up again,we’ll know a better and more responsible way to handle them.

SUICIDE IS NEVER THE ANSWER. UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Like,EVER.

Who knows,maybe eventually we’ll get older & wiser,or some shit like that.

Alexa has spoken.

Peace.

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sjdhskgjhfkgfkljkl. Hi.

 

 

It’s official,I am having a writers block. 

Can you even have a writers block when all you do is just write a …blog!?

Well,you can and this is all happening to me right now.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING.

In any way,here’s a beautiful gif of my beloved Sebastian Stan (hitting his head against what seems to be a weird-shaped pillow) to brighten your day. Did that just depressed you enough?

Life is hard,you guys.

****

So,long story short,I’ve been running arround town lately,doing a bunch of stuff (a.ka nothing at all) and in fact,I’m going away for the weekend,as well! Sounds fun? Does it? Well,I’m just gonna be going  to grandmas. Nothing that special. Cries.

In any way,I’m watching Gossip Girl in an hour,and ofcourse,yes I’ve seen every episode already,thankyouverymuch for reminding that to me constantly (yeah,you know who you are) but I just love that show,it’s…. it’s Gossip Girl,okay?!

And it’s on my local TV within an hour,so now you guys know what I’ll be doing approximately 60 minutes from now.

 

Alright,I guess I’ll talk to you guys soon (with ‘you guys’ I just mean all my imaginary friends on Twitter,Tumblr on Facebook – I love you!),so stay safe,don’t do drugs,do your laundry and eat chicken. Because heck yeah,chicken tastes gooooood.

 

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My very personalised “Political Animals” appreciation post.

What is it with those fandoms that everyone always thinks that some certain celebrity is their husband or wife? I mean,he’s mine,obviously. Get over it. (But jk,really) (I just wanted to use this “Awkward” gif,y’all)

With that being said,it’s less than A DAY left till Political Animals go on in the USA. I mean… Sebastian Stan as a drug addicted yet totally adorable politican’s son? I’d tap that. And I’d tap that hard.

Here,I said it.

Alright,so if we pretend that I am not totally embarassed about what I just wrote,I’ve came to a conclusion that I finally have to take some action with my Sebastian obsession.

I think I’m sending a fanmail to him. Who knows,maybe I’ll receive a reply one day?

I’d bet that day will be  like Christmas.

Actually,the other day I thought about how many celebrity crushes I’ve had  (husbands,as I prefer to call them) – I’ve went from Zac Efron to Chace Crawford,to Chris Evans to Sebastian Stan. And I’m not even 18 yet.

Here’s a random thought: I love how people on Tumblr don’t judge you for your obsessions. I mean,someone likes Glee cast,someone likes Britney and someone likes pretty food pictures and all of that is okay – on Tumblr,they like you for who you are (which,most likely,is a crazy nerd freak who spends his time reblogging some deeply pointless shit.) And the best part is – you don’t have to fight over anybody,because we can all share!
It’s not like that person knows we even exist anyway.

And with all that being said,once again – sdlkfjdlkfgjb lgkyujlktjglflkjv lfkl monday morning (when I’ll be able to download it here,hopefully!),Y U SO FAR?

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CODE RED,someone’s been reading my blog!

 

 

Okay,so is it normal that it bothers me that I know that some people actually read my blog!?

And you know what else bothers me,I just noticed I used the word “that” a lot in the last sentence. Whoops. Anyway.

So,back to business,do you guys ever get that feeling that you write something without really thinking about what you’re writing and then suddenly you see in your statistics that someone has been actually reading it? (God forbid,the viewer is from your country!!)

Well,I know this blog of mine is kind of public and all,I mean I even have the link Facebook-ed out on,well,my Facebook and another site I’m on but yeah.

But I guess,unless it’s my parents reading this… What’s the worst that can happen? It’s not like I’d be writing posts and publically bashing people or something.  Although,I did concider it as a possibility. Uhhh. I’ll have to secret-code their names now!

Anyways. That’s a daily dose of randomness from me,take care and eat lots of apples!

I’m allergic to them anyway.

 

 

 

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The meeting: Aftermath

The good news are,I survived. Woohoo! Honestly,when I wrote that post yesterday,for a split second I truly thought “what if he’s a serial killer?”

And then I also thought,if I die,who will notify my Facebook and Twitter friends?

But that was that,really. By the time I got out of the house,I was full of positive thoughts and tried my best to keep it that way,at least untill I get to the place we were supposed to meet.

So,there’s not really much I could say about this… meeting,because that was really what it was,a meeting and nothing more. It wasn’t a date because it didn’t really feel that way… Is that bad?

And I honestly thought it’ll last longer than it did but ofcourse,the mother nature had her own plans and soon enough a storm started and we were basically running for our lifes to not to get either soaked or struck by lightning. Which we didn’t – phew! – but that was close.

In any way,these 35 minutes were pretty nice,I mean there’s nothing bad I could say about it other than that most likely,we won’t be meeting again. At least not in a date-ish way anyway.

But just to calm you guys down,he wasn’t a maniac (at least he didn’t seem like one!),he wasn’t 50 either,in fact he was exactly the same as in his profile picture,which I have to say was releasing.

Needless to mention,I had like tons of make-up on my face for this meeting. Seriously,next time I go out,I’ll go all natural and sh*t. If he won’t like me like that,his loss not mine. Right?

After this meeting,I already know that whoever I go on a date with someday,I will want to sit down and talk because

a) walking and talking is kind of exhausting and b) I just want to experience at least once in my life the way how people date in the movies – you know,the caffeterias and drinks (okay,I don’t drink but just go with it,alright?) and talks and romance and stuff like that…

You know,every girl,and it’s not just me,I mean every girl deserves a fairytale date once in a while,where the guy would take you out to some nice place,be a gentleman and make you feel comfortable the way you are.

So,I guess I’m still waiting for that one beautiful date to happen. But untill then…

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So,I got a meeting today. Oh Em Gee.

I’m going to a meeting (date?) with a guy.

We met on the Internet.

We’re meeting today.

What’s the worse that can happen?

So,here in my place,we have this local social networking site where everybody knows everyone through common friends,neighbours,classmates etc etc etc. It’s basically like,you can even not be related to that person but you have like 16 common friends and unintentionally,you even know half of that person’s family.

But this time it was not really like that,though.

We don’t have common friends and that’s kind of awkward actually. However,during these short few months we’ve communicated – online and on the phone though – and I feel like I know at least 70% about that person already so I guess it’s about the time we take it to the next level and meet up,right? For crying out loud,we’re from the same city. It couldn’t be that bad.

But then again,do I really know what I’m doing? Do I? I’m not sure about it myself.

Pfft. Too late to cancel,though. And it’s not like we’re meeting during the night in a filthy bar full of shady people,right? It’ll be day time,perfectly normal,full of people,it shall be just fine. Right?

In any way,if I don’t come back to this blog within few days – well… You guys know what I was doing today.

Yikes. I really regret writing that last sentence,it’s depressing the sh*t out of me right now.

Talk to you later,guys!

And by the way,does any of you have like a dating experience where you have met through the Net? Please comment and tell me because honestly,I just need to hear.

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SOME OLD-SCHOOL CHIC

I was just recently watching an old Marilyn Monroe movie and got totally mesmerized how playful and cute she actually was. Okay,I’ve heard how they say that Marilyn was probably one of the most difficult Hollywood actresses to work with but didn’t that all pay off when they saw the final result?! That is what I am thinking.

I really loved ”How To Marry A Millionaire” because,surprisingly,everything in that movie was just so true and relatable,even for the 21st century gal like me.

So,thank you Marilyn for your voice,playful acting,beautiful smile and iconic figure,which will always stay as a reminder to all the young and aspiring ladies out there that being curvy is an effect not a deffect.

Such a shame she died.

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